Wow! Okay ... where to segue from there? I finally was able to meet up with a friend this week. While we were sitting at a coffee shop downtown, I realized how important her friendship to me is. We may have not known each other forever and ever and ever (yet), but her love for others and for God and her sweet spirit is contagious! She is someone who you just WANT to be around and someone who is a great listener! I just feel so blessed these days ...even with a semi-chaotic life most of the time, here lately it seems as if things are starting to look up. Once I finally let doors shut that needed to be shut, bigger and better doors are being opened. And we even talked about ripping off bandaids so healing can begin, so here's to a friendship that I can tell is for a reason.
And I don't even know where to begin this one. When I first started teaching, a co-worker invited me to church. I was new to the area and was looking for a church, so it was perfect timing! Little did I know how wonderful of a woman she really is, but I know now how beyond amazing she is! She knew when to leave encouraging notes and scriptures on my desk and she knew when to send a short message letting me know she was thinking of/praying for me ... but I don't think she knew how much of a blessing it was when she introduced me to her daughters. They are amazing women with so much love and compassion, and one of them challenged me to write down one of the hardest things I have ever had to think about. She has been on my heart for a while now, and I reached out to her just to send a little encouragement when I had no idea she would be challenging me to "become a better me" (ties in to the beginning of this post ... hmm maybe that's the theme?). She gave me homework Sunday night and told me to have it written down by the time we would meet up for lunch later this week. I've been enjoying my time at the pool this week with the beautiful weather and summer break, and have had PLENTY of time to think about this assignment. That makes it even harder. Her instructions were to write down any goals I have. Wow! Sounds simple, right? WRONG! Her statement after she said to write down goals that I have was along the lines of most of the time we have a dream and we push it aside because it seems out of reach or unlikely to happen, but if we have a goal, then we are turning our dreams into reality because WITH HIM ANYTHING IS POSSIBLE! Told you it was harder than it seemed! So here is my writing of goals... *insert deep breath here* (and exhale).
1) I want to change the face of education. I am a kindergarten teacher with many who do, but a select (and important) few who don't, believe in me as an educator. My goal is to not only prove them wrong, but to prove to myself that I can do it. I want to work my way up to a job in administration that will allow me to better the lives of students and educators and the only thing not on my side -- is time. I know I have to have more education (which takes time and money), and I know I have to, in general, let time run it's course and teach me more life lessons. Quite frankly, I know I can't do anything to change time, so I will do everything in my will to change what I can and push myself to do this.
2) I want someone to want me to want them, not someone who needs me to need them. I want to find the guy who is currently bettering himself with his relationship with Christ and working hard in his career and getting himself to the better him he can be while I make myself the better me I can be and when we find each other we WANT each other's company, we don't need it. My goal here is to find someone who compliments me and who I can compliment as well, to put myself out there, make myself available, all while staying guarded ...and definitely not settling for less than I deserve.
3) I want to travel the world! I want to go to different countries, different states, different counties and meet people, experience culture, and take in God's beauty from every angle.
4) I want to stop putting my faith in the world and in people, and really focus on my relationship with the man upstairs. I really want to be able to worship without reservation and read the good book and be able to relate it to my life. I want to have faith so strong it can't be shaken, and I want to share my love with others. Music does something indescribale to me ...whether it's the radio or playing an instrument, it just does something almost paralyzing and rejuvinating all at the same time -- so maybe that's something to look into? Maybe it's time to form a clear dream and make it a goal ...and achieve it.
5) I want to be fit and healthy again. I know this takes dedication and commitment, but it's time for me to stop playing the blaming game and own up, right? I've joined a former teammate in the Herbalife journey, and I'm hoping this is the first stepping stone to a healthier life which will soon lead to a more confident me.
Okay, so now I have 5 goals listed ... I am officially being held accountable. It will be hard. Everything in life worth something is hard, because if it were easy, everyone would have achieved it, right? Here's to making moves! Feel free to make up a title, I'm going to go with "A whirlwind of emotions, thoughts, dreams, goals, and advice".
